I’M A PLANNING GENIUS

March 8th, 2012

I thought I was a genius, when offered a dorm room (“It’s more of an upscale

dorm room for guests of the University Steve”) for only about $50 a night, I

thought it made a lot of sense, so I could “Roll out of bed” and be on show site

within minutes with a fresh Tim Horton’s in my hand. ($10 for any of my American

friends who can tell me what a “Timbit” is, without googling). It seemed like it

made sense with the closest hotel, a Holiday Inn, being about 15 miles away in a

busy traffic route, and me having to rent a car, which isn’t necessarily good

for the general populace.

At 10PM last night, the party started next door. It seemed harmless, with the

exception of the fact that they were playing Abba. Around 11:30, when I

completed my work for the evening, it was at a full simmer. So, I went next

door, politely knocked on the door and some 19 year old girl answered and

probably thought I was someone’s dad. “Like can I help you?” she said. I said

“Yes, please be quiet, I am your neighbor and I wish to get some sleep”. She

said “Oh, okay” and then the noise simmered down. For about 4 minutes. Then I

called the front desk who the equally young kid came down and asked them to

quiet down. They did. For about 3 minutes. After this routine cycled again I

drifted in and out of sleep, constantly being alarmed awake, and it

disintegrated to me knocking on the walls and yelling “Shut Up!” By this point,

the party had drifted into several rooms. Damn I wish I was them. But I am not,

and have to be on the jobsite at 6:30AM.

At 2:40AM, I called the desk and said “You need to get campus security here

ASAP. I can’t take this anymore” To which the young man said “I can’t do that”.

I said “Fine”. I then, bleary eyed, went to Google, found the Oshawa Police,

called them, and within 15 minutes my hallway was littered with campus police

and I am presuming the Oshawa Police. The party came to a thudding halt.

As I quickly ran out the front door late at 6:30AM, the kid in the front said

“Hey.....are you that dude that called me late last night?” I said “Yes, are you

that kid that I called late last night?” He seemed flummoxed by my reply.....then

he said “You know I would have handled that you know”. I said “No, in fact you

said that you couldn’t call anyone to help me”. He said “I had it covered”. “I

said you know, you had a few hours to fix it and you didn’t” He said “These

things you can fix that easily”. Then it was clear to me. I should have stayed

at a Holiday Inn.

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